Children that are frequently told how to practice and pressure their children to do skills are developing a child that will become dependent on them. Even though the intentions of a parent may be to support and direct their child, it often backfires and the child refuses to do what is asked in order to gain control. Being your child’s team manger sets everyone up for failure over time.
Gradually, as a parent assumes too much responsibility for the success and failure of their child, the child begins to control less and less. Sometimes parents find that they care more about their child’s sport than their child does. Allow your child to maintain the responsibility and control over their sport. Supporting your child is good, but too much control will backfire.
As time passes, the parents that criticize their child’s every move will become more intense. The child’s negative attitude towards their sport will increase and conflicts at home and in the gym will increase as well. As children become older the conflict again will intensify as children develop their own opinions and struggle for their independence. Young teens that are frustrated about not having control over their passions will eventually quit.
One solution would be to Offer choices instead of punishments. Allowing choices to kids gives them back the control they need. Also be careful extending rewards as bribery; children may begin doing things only for rewards. Balancing a healthy relationship with your child during their years in sports is difficult. Make sure that your child feels like doing their sport and that it is their idea. Help them develop their own passion and help them make good choices.